Male Self and Shiva

Healing Our Own Masculinity

Concepts of masculinity are linked to our first embodied experience of the masculine which can be early representations of men in our lives.

The approaches used in PSI and Ancient Tantra involve integrating various aspects of masculinity, such as strength, assertiveness, vulnerability, and emotional depth, to create a balanced and authentic sense of ourself.

An artistic representation of Masculine qualities in the Male Self as Shiva.

When comparing Harvey Grady's work in Personal Selves Integration (PSI) with the understanding of masculine energy in Tantra, we see similarities in the emphasis on integrating different aspects of masculinity to achieve wholeness and balance.

Both perspectives highlight the importance of embracing strength, vulnerability, and authenticity in expressing masculine energy effectively and harmoniously.

Engaging with the more masculine qualities of life as a human being involves embracing characteristics such as strength, assertiveness, focus, and action. Here are some ways to cultivate these qualities:

1. Physical Activity:

Engage in physical activities like weightlifting, martial arts, or sports to build strength and endurance, which can help cultivate a sense of masculinity.

🏋️‍♂️ “When I move, train, or sweat, am I disciplining the body—or awakening my inner fire? Can I feel the pulse of Shakti rising in my breath and bones?”

Tantric Seed Thought:

“My strength is not for domination—it is the vessel for devotion.”

Mantra: Om Rudraya Namaha

2. Setting Goals:

Develop a clear vision for your life and set goals to work towards. This involves planning, taking action, and being decisive, all of which are considered masculine qualities.

🎯 “Are the goals I pursue born from egoic desire or soul-aligned vision? Am I willing to listen deeply to the current of my Dharma?”

Tantric Seed Thought:

“To know where I’m going, I must feel where I’m called.”

Mantra: Om Kriyashaktyai Namaha

3. Assertiveness:

Practice asserting yourself in a respectful and confident manner. Communicate your needs, boundaries, and opinions effectively.

🗣️ “How do I honor my voice without overpowering others? Can I speak with clarity and love, even when I say ‘no’?”

Tantric Seed Thought:

“My voice is a sword of truth—sharp, but never violent.”

Mantra: Ham

4. Mindfulness and Focus:

Cultivate mindfulness practices like meditation to improve focus, clarity, and the ability to stay present in the moment.

🧘 “Can I remain unmoved in the center of chaos? Do I cultivate stillness not as escape, but as sacred presence?”

Tantric Seed Thought:

“I am the Witness. I am the Flame that sees but does not burn.”

Mantra: So’ham (I am That)

5. Emotional Awareness and Expression:

Embrace vulnerability and emotional depth by exploring and expressing your feelings in a healthy way. This helps in developing emotional intelligence.

💧 “Do I allow my emotions to flow as sacred messengers, or do I armor my heart in silence? What am I protecting, and why?”

Tantric Seed Thought:

“Vulnerability is not weakness—it is the Shakti that softens Shiva.”

Mantra: Yam

6. Leadership:

Take on leadership roles or responsibilities to develop skills in decision-making, problem-solving, and guiding others.

👑 “Do I lead from control or service? Can I hold space for others while staying anchored in truth?”

Tantric Seed Thought:

“True leadership is the art of listening first and guiding from love.”

Mantra: Om Namah Shivaya

7. Self-Reflection:

Engage in self-reflection to understand your values, strengths, and areas for growth. This introspection can help you align with your authentic self.

🪞 “What parts of me do I reject or inflate? Where am I resisting my own wholeness—and where am I ready to meet myself fully?”

Tantric Seed Thought:

“Integration is the highest initiation.”

Mantra: Aham Brahmasmi (I am the Absolute)

By incorporating these practices into your life, you can cultivate and engage with the more masculine qualities within you, leading to personal growth, self-awareness, and a sense of empowerment.

Shadow Work: Male Self Alchemy

Take a moment with yourself and read the following questions and allow your sense of purspose and power speak back to you. Try not to self edit your ideas or thoughts, instead witness what comes through as if you are giving a part of yourself some time to express how it feels directly to you for you to listen. You can write down the reflections or even lean into the feeling of each reflection fully and tune it to what wants to be remembered. Drink high quality water and be sure to give yourself the time and space required to truly be with yourself. Projections and Patterns are 2 of many common triggers that allow us to dive deep into what the work wants to show us. By starting this practice, we are working with the parts of us that are ready to expose life long patterns as well as places where we are confronted with our sense of power.

ALL IS HERE TO EVOLVE US TOWARDS A DEEPER RELATING WITH OURCELLVES!

🧠 1.

Father-Wound Patterns

These are unconscious emotional imprints and beliefs formed from your relationship (or lack thereof) with your biological, adopted, or symbolic father—or any male caretaker figure.

💭 Journal Prompts:

• “How did my father (or male guardian) express anger, love, or vulnerability?”

• “What did I learn from him about power, success, or failure?”

• “When have I felt unseen, controlled, or dismissed by masculine energy in my life?”

• “Do I reject or over-identify with my father’s traits in myself?”

• “What part of my Male Self still seeks his approval or fears becoming like him?”

  
  

🔍 2.

Authority Projections

This refers to how we project unconscious beliefs onto people in authority—bosses, teachers, spiritual leaders, or even government systems—based on unintegrated dynamics with father or Male Self energy.

💭 Journal Prompts:

• “When I encounter authority, do I comply, rebel, or freeze? Why?”

• “Do I trust my own authority—or do I seek permission to act?”

• “What kind of masculine energy do I attract or fear in mentors, leaders, or lovers?”

• “Where in life do I feel powerless—and whom do I unconsciously give my power to?”